Drunk Anatomy

You thought I was gone, didn't you? You thought I forgot and dropped the ball, huh? Well, eat some humble pie and enjoy that egg on your face, Wrong-o of Wrongington, because I had the week off but now I'm back and more confused than ever.

So let's get into some Drunk Anatomy!

This week/today/this individual blog post, we will be discovering some truths about ourselves and the orbicularis oris. (Allow me to get this off my chest: what is with these naaaaaames?)

Don't let the stuffy, overly-complicated name fool you, this muscle has some intrigue attached to it. The orbicularis oris is, in some dark, juvenile corners of the world, known as "the kissing muscle."

How did you know where to find that gif?

Maybe I have a Tumblr, it's whatever, let's move on, don't make eye contact with me. In the olden anatomy times, anatomists--anatomers? anatomologists?--thought this muscle was a circle but they were wrong. Dead wrong. It's not just one ring to rule them all, it's a bunch of muscle fibers overlapping and working together to move your mouth and I think that's beautiful. Maybe "a bunch of muscle fibers overlapping and working together" can be our "always."

Wait, did I even cover that the orbicularis oris is in the lips? I did not. Ugh, I had one job to do! Not really, I have like a million, but still, REMORSE.

Okay, to recap: the kissing muscle, in the lips, not just one continuous circular muscle.

This Drunk Anatomy is surprisingly anatomy-oriented.

Thank you for noticing! I do my darnedest to bring you informative content, though admittedly not consistently. Based on the nicknamification, we know the orbicularis oris is involved in smooching, but what else?

Side bar: based on the spelling and how it looks like binocular, did anyone else think it was near the eyes? (I have a mild form of self-diagnosed dyslexia so maybe I'm wrong, but that is a very rare occurrence and you can bet your sweet tuckus that I would rather die than admit it.) Anyway, let me know in the comments if you thought so, too! I'm trying this new thing where I engage the readers; it's not really yielding anything as of yet.

Other times your orbicularis oris is in play: when you're lip-syncing for your life; when you're drinking out of a straw, which is the superior way to consume beverages; when you're playing an instrument that involves a mouthpiece; when you're talking endlessly at a rapid-fire pace like you're one of those Gilmore Girls; when you're pursing your lips in a selfie; when you frown; when you smile; when you peel your lip back in disgust; and so many more instances!

It seems like the stretches for the orbicularis oris would range from really weird to nonexistent. And, yes, it does look like the word "binocular."

Thank you and also agreed, babe! Man, you are being so supportive today. (I pronounce "babe" as "beb," just so you are aware and hearing it in your head that way.) I wonder if the orbicularis oris ever gets sore? No, right? In my experience, it's not a thing but who knows? And I suppose to stretch it out you could open your mouth super wide like you're at the dentist except without the mind-numbing fear, let it go slack, and just wiggle your lips around as much as you can to shake out whatever tension you manage to have stored in there.

This may come as a surprise to you--maybe not, I don't know your life--but our therapists can massage your face! I don't know how great the Biotone Advanced Therapy Massage Creme is for your face skin, but it's worth it! Face/jaw massages hurt SO MUCH, I can't even tell you. I've never had them work on my mouth but I'm sure they'd do it, even if they were grossed out about it because customer service. 

Lindsay is the Office Superhero (check the business cards) at Mantis Massage. She knows essentially zilch about massage therapy other than that it feels real nice. Lindsay might maybe possibly definitely be inebriated for these discussions, but who's to say?

 Image courtesy of giphy.com.