Drunk Anatomy

S'up, beaches? How's it going? You get turned up this weekend? I had a pretty gnarly weekend myself-- I walked for 8 mother loving hours and now my legs are wrecked. WRECKED.

You may be wondering why I'm talking (Would 'writing' be more apt here? I mean, I feel like we're just gabbing but technicalities and such.) in this cringe-worthy manner and if you're not, I'm a little offended that you would think this is how I always sound.

Well, I'm just getting in character for the muscle of the week because its name has some serious vibes attached to it. Until recently I'm sure it was just a normal name, but now! Now it's a whole different story.

The muscle of the week is the supinator!

Is that not the most bro-y muscle you've ever heard of? Supinator! Jabroni! Dudemiester! Sick kegstand, man! You killed that!

Whoever named/discovered this muscle wants to rise from the grave to straight up murder me and I don't blame them.

So let's get into it!

What's this muscle's deal?

What isn't this muscle's deal, more like! A lot things, actually. Muscles generally only do like 1-2 things, tops. But those 1-2 things they do, they do 'em really well (in most cases).

First, let's talk about where the supinator can be found--outside of a fraternity, of course. The supinator is a short and stout muscle that wraps around the radius in the upper portion of the forearm. Wow, I explained that really well.

Eh, I've seen better explanations.

Oh, yeah? Name one time! I'll wait right here.

No, I won't.

The supinator, when it's not too busy playing beer pong, is used to rotate the arm so that your palm is facing the world at large. Do you want some examples? No? Too bad!

You use your supinator when you grip the sides of a keg to do a kegstand; when you shoot hoops; when you take off your backwards snapback and/or fluorescent plastic shades; when you raise the roof; when you do an overly complicated handshake with a bro as a symbol of how much you love your bro but only in a purely platonic bro way; when you pull on your boat shoes that you wear under non-boating conditions; when you dance by, like, flexing your arms and just kind of rocking side to side; when you're doing some crude hand gesture that is truly the peak of humor; and other ways, both bro-y and not!

Do you actually know any bros or is this all based off of media interpretations?

I have known bros in my time and I have also seen a lot of movies and TV shows so I am well-versed in bro-dom, okay?

This is the home care portion of the blog post and just because the supinator overcompensates with hyper masculinity and can't admit to any vulnerabilities doesn't mean it never gets strained. It does. And it happens every day right under our collective noses.

To stretch your supinator, extend your arm at the forearm- you can bend your arm at the elbow but make sure your forearm is parallel to the ground and your hand is out like you're going to shake someone's hand. Then turn your hand so it's flat with the palm facing the ground and with your other hand, hold your extended hand and turn it inwards. Hold that position for like 30 seconds and voila! A stretched supinator.

If that seems like too much work, you can always book a massage with us and ask for some forearm work!


Lindsay is the Communications Maven at Mantis Massage. She knows essentially zilch about massage therapy other than that it feels real nice. Lindsay might maybe possibly definitely be inebriated for these discussions, but who's to say?